Journal Entry #1

Intimately/Musically speaking...


I was told by one Sonny Bono that I've perfected the journal-entry style of rhyme writing; hence the title. With that being said, I won't give much foreword but to say that it's relatively self-explanatory.

Find My Soul by youngiftednblack

Lyrics:

Lately, I’ve been trying to figure out my purpose, feeling worthless cause I’m not working, I’m only going through the motions, wording thoughts and emotions spoken over beats hoping it’s heard, but alas, it’s for nothing, cause when I showed it, she responded leave her alone, and another is going off when we speak on the phone, and my brother makes late night trips so I’m sleeping alone, in his apartment, that doesn’t quite seem to be home, so no wonder you can only find me deep in these poems, communication skills lacking from this retreat that I’m on, can’t seem to reach beyond me when I zone, see, I can show my teeth when I’m on-stage, but when the curtain’s drawn, I’m just as weak as I’m strong, or seem to be when I know, they look to me for that glow, of confidence, but I’m not sure where to find it, so, I walk through the dark trying to keep my feet to the floor, who knows when this will subside, the deepest of lows

I just need some time alone, to find my soul, and I just wanna work this out, but I can’t seem to do it, on my own

Mapping out the placement, of the voices and the faces, I need to start questioning the choices that I’m making, and how can I be honest with you, I can’t even be honest with me, so I try to step out my shoes, to see the point of the picture, painted, none of it fiction, all truth, so I look away, cause I don’t wanna be witness to all of my faults, all of the awful thoughts you have about me, all of it brought on by all of my tall, shortcomings, and the fact is it’s evident, we’re all searching for some relevance, cause it’s better when you’re needed and wanted than when you need it and want it, no one wants to plead and beg, please, keep me, I’m worth it, and although it seems I’m speaking to another, truthfully, I’m saying this, for my own sake, so when the tears form as I compose this, I know it means more than I’ll ever know, as I feel my soul shake


--- ygb